最近在整理東西時，出現了女兒八年級時寫的一首詩，描述了在不同的情境，扮演的不同角色。詩名是：My Many Faces，和大家分享：
My Many faces
I have many faces one face belongs to the girl
that belong to very different sides who thinks about questions
of me. and puts her hand up if she thinks
Everybody sees a different face she can answer it.
They vary as much as the colors Her face frowns in concentration
in a rainbow during tests
Yet together make me as a whole. and afterwards she hopes she knew
enough
One face is the face that belongs to pass the test.
to an obedient daughter That face belongs to the student my
who smiles teachers see.
she always says
“Thank you” after meals One face is the tearstained face
and only rarely argues. that belongs to a girl who thinks
That’s the girl my mother sees. she has failed.
That face belongs to a girl who cries
One face is the giggling face because she thinks she will never
Of a hyperactive friend. understand that math problem
Who constantly talks in a stream or understand that friends.
of words It’s a face that belongs to a girl who
that come out as many feels that all is lost.
multi-colored bubbles That’s the face that belongs to the
and float for a long time in air. girl my tears see.
That face may give words of
comfort One face belongs to a girl who
or simply give advice on math thinks everything is possible.
That’s the face of the girl my She is confident
friends see. and strides across the school
and everywhere else
One face belongs to the little sister thinking about how she will
Begging succeed.
her older brother for help.
She pesters and prods That’s the face of the girl who my
annoying as a mosquito dreams see.
until her promises to help.
That’s the face that belongs to the And one face belongs to the girl
girl my brother sees. who sits by herself
Listens to the music of the rain
One face belongs to a girl outside
who tries to be noticed and cries over the world.
But who also at the same time She knows she will never change
Doesn’t want to be noticed as (too ) much.
weird. That’s the girl I see.
That face blushes and tries to stay
invisible-and succeeds most of the
tiime.
That’s the face of the girl my crush
(Doesn’t) see.
讀著這首詩，想到媽媽們常常說孩子在家很調皮，在外面卻表現的很乖巧。孩子在家裏和在學校，好似完全不同的人。對朋友，也和對待父母不相同。也許這就是女兒描述的多重面貌吧！
在不同的情境扮演不同的角色是需要的。也可以想像是在不同的場合戴著不同的面具在與人互動。而家的本質是不必每秒鐘都得對自己警覺，不必刻意表現的地方。家是我們放鬆的地方。所以，回到家的行爲，和在外面不同是可以理解的。
孩子需要明瞭的是哪些角色行爲是應該的，是恰當的，是合理的，是受人歡迎的，會另人感謝的，然後歡喜接受，自然的做自己。
但這不是一件容易的事。因爲個性、認知程度、心理成熟度的不同，孩子在摸索過程，難免會有得罪他人，惹人生氣的時候，甚至闖禍的情形。爸媽們應該用心觀察，然後把握機會，讓孩子從經驗中習得合宜的行爲。
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